The Division

The Division Hand

I’ve been coming at you all hot and heavy lately with the quasi-serious metaphysical discussions.  Death, the afterlife, precognition – none of these are your usual topics of conversation in a nail blog.  So after that hopefully interesting diversion, let’s take a moment and go back to what we do best around here, nerd nails!

This manicure is for my husband, King of the Nerds (King of the Dipshits, in the parlance of Sixteen Candles.) As of some 325 playable hours ago, my husband became quite enamoured with Ubisoft’s latest Tom Clancy-branded video game, The Division.  In it, you run around a nearly deserted, pandemic-stricken New York City as one of a team of random badasses handing out supplies to ill stragglers whilst gunning down enemies and former allies-turned-enemies (also known as rogues; also also known as asshole 12-year-olds who just play video games to f**k shit up.)

Fans (Mr. Finger Candy included) will insist that they play this game because of its online tactical first person shooter open world RPG and blah diddy blah, blah, blah.  That’s the smokescreen they throw up to hide the real thing they love about this game – collecting. Oh yeah, The Division is a collector game all right.  Clothes, mostly (“I got a Sentry Call Backpack last night!” was the first thing my husband said to me this morning, by way of greeting) but also weaponry and parts of weaponry, and probably one day very soon some household/base items as well (the nesting instinct is strong among the agents of The Division.)  It’s the Sims if they offered a Post-Apocalyptic Stuff Pack.

Don’t say I don’t love you, man (never any question, particularly if you look back at that 325-hour number.)

The Division Fingers

8 thoughts on “The Division

  1. How funny….this is also been a major focus for my husband as well. It appears that the first thing checked upon starting the game is that day’s paint color scheme that can be applied to the weaponry or main gun they use or whatever. I recall one recently called “chocolate chip desert” (not dessert, they are all camo patterns)…

    The collecting/building certainly seems a big point to Elder Scrolls/Skyrim (whatever) and Fallout. This game puzzles me…I’ve asked about the passage of time, hearing the same audio feed conversations over and over…apparently he and his buddy just keep playing over and over on various levels of difficulty (for the sake of accomplishment awards)…

    I add levels of difficulty when I have to walk between him and the tv 😀

    Sweet mani, my sister! *high five*

    • Yes! Oh lord, I don’t know whether to take comfort in the fact that somebody (somebodies) else is going through the same thing. It’s the oddest game – like you said, SO REPETITIVE.

      Before it dawned on him that it was flat out cheating (my husband hates cheating/hacks – he’s pretty old school like that) my husband was hooking up with these guys, and all they’d do is climb this ladder that went to nowhere (their characters would emerge on, like, a fog-covered platform; literally a fogged-in spot in the code) and then just shoot into the fog, amassing XP and whatever else as they went. The game was registering the shots as legitimate hits, and they were all level-upping like mad. I was finally like, “Sweetie, this is so lame. You’ve been firing into a wall of fog for 45 straight minutes now. How is this playing the game?”

      • LOL I haven’t seen the ladder to nowhere, I’ll have to ask about that. That’s pretty funny (“how is this playing the game?”)…. Good question!

        I’ve noticed when I hang out in the living room on weekends how repetitive much of the audio in any game is. Diablo drove me insane!

      • See, that’s why my husband plays with headphones (aside from the obvious advantages of playing online games with a mic.) And I’m over on the computer doing my thing, probably also with headphones on. But we both tend to cock them off to the side and off one ear so we can still hear and talk to each other…it’s a weird new world.

        Anyhow, in complete agreement on the repetitive thing, but headphones help. For a while my husband was playing this HORRIBLE Walking Dead game that featured the voices of the guys who play Daryl and played Merle. They had recorded maybe 20 lines between them for the entire game, which was just the worst (super bad graphics and mechanics, dumb story) and they just kept going on and on and on…”Aw, hell naw, Dix!” will haunt my dreams.

  2. LOL! That soinds about as annoying as Diablo, thankfully enough time has passed that I’ve started to forget the actual repeated phrases

    He is usually wearing the mic/single ear headset playing with his buddy…but when I got back tonight from dog walk they had yet to start any game. He announced this was due to the fact he was (suddenly, to me) was sick of The Division. :O

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