Beachy Keen

For all my friends longing for – or on the cusp of – a nice, relaxing beach day.  Me, I don’t do beaches.  Me + sun = crispy red lobster, so I tend to abstain.  I’m also totally that pooh that sits there in a long-sleeved rash guard, sarong, wide-brimmed hat and SPF 70, fussily rotating the beach umbrella into the shade every 23 and a half minutes.

So no actual beaches for me!  But I’m quite content with this very beachy manicure, which utilizes a new-to-me technique, water spotting.  In water spotting, you drop a few polish droplets onto the surface of water (here a basic white creme to mimic the sudsy surf rushing ashore a sandy beach.)  Then taking a spray perfume or cologne, spritz onto the surface of the polish, creating a semi-transparent, lacy effect like the rushing surf. Then you dip your painted nails into the polish as you would with a water marble manicure.  And since no shoreline would be complete without at least a few seashells and starfish, I added a few of those, too.  Surf’s up!

Surf Kitties

I love the idea of surfing, but unfortunately, as we all know, I’m a real weenie about getting in the water with sea life that wants to eat me. But surfing looks glorious, doesn’t it? I love everything about it – the culture that surrounds it, the people it attracts, the athleticism, the spirituality, the breathtaking locales. I love it so much, Blue Crush is one of my favourite movies, and that’s not something a lot of people would admit! So it’s something I love the idea of, but I’m also fully aware that it’s something I’ll never, ever do, because I am so scared of being munched on by sharks, and I’m also not that jazzed at the thought of dashing my brains out on a wall of coral. So once again, this will have to be one of those admire-from-afar things, which is cool when what you’re admiring are these fun, super summery nails instead.

For this beach kitten mani, I used some glittery kitty nail stickers from Daily Charme. A note on using a topcoat over the stickers: Don’t. They will pretty well melt on contact. That’s a lesson the cat that was on my middle finger learned the hard way.

Beach Vacay! (OMD3)

It’s pretty funny that I’ve chosen to depict some traditional elements of a beach vacation on my nails for day 21’s theme of travel in the Oh Mon Dieu Nail Art Challenge, as what I’ve shown here is pretty much my version of vacation hell. For one, I am INCREDIBLY fair skinned. Nothing a little SPF 65 can’t (hardly) handle. Secondly, and perhaps flowing from number one, I actively dislike the sensation of sunshine on my skin. Sitting out in the sun, I am always acutely aware that I’m roasting my delicate, pink pig skin, just without the benefit of being ringed in carrots, potatoes and various aromatics. Thirdly, although I’m a very strong swimmer, I’m really, REALLY scared of being touched or nibbled upon by just about every bit of flora and fauna under the sea. I also loathe getting sand up my swimsuit. So no to the actual beach vacation, but yes to these beachy nails – definitely my kind of travel.

Beach Towel Stripes

Better get moving, seawater, sun and sand-worshippers, the clock is ticking on this year’s beach season. I suspect that most outdoorsy, adventurous, activity-oriented people (you know, not me) are spending the day unenviously running the roads, heading home from cottages and last minute vacations before the kiddies head back to school tomorrow. But I suppose there’s time enough for one last sprawl on the beach, if you’re into that sort of thing (guess which nail art-loving blogger is not?) I hope it’s a good one. Don’t forget to thoroughly apply your sunscreen. 🙂

Chevron Waves (OMD2)

Let’s see, sandy beach, gently lapping waves…if this post was being written by anybody other than me, they might actually be into that! It’s not that I’ve got anything against beaches, it’s just that the beaches really seem to have something against me. I’m just not a beach person. Sitting under an umbrella with a good book and a drink sounds like it would be fun for about two hours, and then I guarantee you I’m looking for more air conditioned locales. Also, as we’ve covered about 100 times on this very blog, beaches are typically adjacent to slimy critter-concealing bodies of water that I refuse to even wade in. Plus I have never not burned (the summer my Egyptian friend and I had a tan-off was a very bad one indeed) and I tend to wilt in the humidity. I’m simply not a nature person under the very best of circumstances, both in temperament and pasty white skin tone, so I’d do well to stay off the beaches.

But that doesn’t mean I can’t find a way to enjoy beaches on my own terms, say safely confined to my nails where I can’t be eaten, sustain a burn or get sand up my swimsuit? Sounds like a plan! And that’s how these beachy nails came about, an idea I just sort of fell into while messing around with some new polishes and day 20’s theme of chevron in the Oh Mon Dieu nail art challenge. Chevrons lend themselves quite nicely to wave-type designs, and they look particularly lovely when crowded up against one another in a wealth of sea green polishes (one might even say they look beachy keen? Huh, huh? Nothing? Man, I’m losing my touch with corny jokes…)

Look What the Tide Washed In

For as long as I can remember, I’ve been afraid of the ocean, or more specifically, the slimy, bitey critters that dwell beneath its surface. Any large bodies of water make me twitchy, actually, with tree-choked eastern Ontario lakes being the very least desirable of the bunch. I would never classify it as a phobia, however, as I live just a skipped stone’s throw from a major river, don’t mind boating and am generally fascinated with the very water-based creatures I’m terrified of (whaddup, IMAX shark movies?!); I just dislike the thought of being stung or eaten or – *shudder* – brushed against (and then stung and eaten.)

I’m also not so frightened of underwater beasties and the dark, shadowy worlds they inhabit that I can’t enjoy a bit of beach-themed nail art, which is where these nails come in. And that’s just how I like it – me, indoors, safe and sound and salt-free (ask my parents how much I whined about my “salt crust” after I once deigned to venture out into the ocean in about half a foot of water), enjoying the majesty of the big blue from a prettily polished and respectful distance. 😉