Very Versailles

Versailles 2

I suppose it’s not too surprising this manicure turned out as Baroque-n as it did – I have been watching an awful lot of the new live action Beauty and the Beast lately, and its wall-to-wall pastels and gold filigreed adornments speak to that part of me that sometimes likes her surroundings to be flouncy, ultra feminine and possibly way, way, WAY too much.  Not, like, enchanted talking furniture too much, but just a lot of pink and excessively gilded molding. 😉

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Before the Last Petal Falls

Rose Collage

Australian indie lacquer maker, Picture Polish, creates THE best scattered holos – rich, vibrant, one-coater cremes sprinkled with holographic pixie dust.  They’re beautiful polishes for use in nail art, and fantastic for everyday wear; I never get as many compliments as I do when I’m wearing one of Picture Polish’s gorgeous hues.

And do you know what makes a Picture Polish polish even better?  When it’s laying down a little free(bie) lacquer love, baby – purchased with points I amassed through Nail Polish Canada’s reward program, a nifty little thank you for, well, buying so much stuff!  NPC’s constantly updating rewards catalog always has a nice assortment of premium polishes on offer, but I jumped at the chance to grab Rose, which has been on my lacquer wish list now for quite some time.  And it’s just as beautiful as I had hoped it would be – a slightly darker version of one of my all time favourite polishes, Electric Dream.  And it may just be subliminal suggestion based on this polish’s name, but I think Rose is the exact colour of the Enchanted Rose in Beauty and the Beast – rich, plush, a beautiful floral countdown of impending doom.  You know, the usual. 😉

Rose Fingers

Les Belles Fleurs

Les Fleurs HandOr might that be “Belle fleurs,” as in Belle from Beauty and the Beast, whose entrance-making golden yellow gown I always think of when I use this cheery yellow shade, Pure Ice’s Show Stopper, along with any vibrant pink and green (with just a tiny touch of gold for that little sparkly something.)

Holo Floral

Holo Flowers HandI’m feeling a bit under the weather today, so I thought I’d keep it uplifting and Springy with this all-holographic mani inspired by the print on the Beast’s fireside chair in Beauty and the Beast. Random, I know, but I was watching it recently and couldn’t help admiring its lovely, embroidered floral fabric. Quite the bold choice for the cursed, castle-bound gentleman. It actually makes me wonder if the Beast was in touch with his lovey dovey side right from the very beginning, because it’s just not possible to be a loveless monster with taste in textiles like that. It’s just not.

For these floral nails I used a whole bouquet of holo polishes from Cirque, Lilypad Lacquer and KB Shimmer, but the real standout is Enchanted Polish’s lavender Time to Pretend, the label of which looks very much like the Beast’s woods-and-fog-shrouded castle. Tale as old as time…Holo Flowers CollageHolo Flowers Fingers

My, What a Guy! (31DC2014)

Gaston!I’m still neck-deep in Disney manicures as the 31 Day Nail Art Challenge enters its fourth and final week. Yesterday’s theme was “inspired by a song,” which posed a bit of a conundrum for yours truly, as there’s a long list of songs in the Disney canon, from classic musical numbers to movie scores to the steel drum-tinged tunes that play in and around the parks, that set my feet a tappin’.

But I do have a favourite Disney ditty, and I suspect it’s one a lot of people like, because no matter the form – stage, screen, blasting through your headphones – it’s a real showstopper and a true Disney classic. So what song am I speaking of? Why, the Gaston song, of course (simply and creatively titled “Gaston”), that drunken, rollicking ode to the Beauty and the Beast villain and some of his more Neanderthal-esque qualities. Gaston’s a real nasty piece of work, the town bully and an abusive, misogynistic ass whose behaviour is only just barely tolerated because he’s got purty, purty blue eyes and a swell cleft in his chin. He’s doted on by his toadie, a snivelling little jerk named LeFou, and lusted after by three of the local tavern wenches, star-eyed girls with heaving bosoms who collapse at his feet when he deigns to throw them a glance, yet positively reviled by Belle, the adventurous bookworm who turns his grotesque proposal down FLAT (good girl.) That, of course, irks him to no end, so when Belle ventures off and falls in love with the Beast, as one is wont to do, he does the thing any heartbroken guy would and has her father committed to an insane asylum before declaring war on the Beast’s castle and its occupants. That plan actually doesn’t work out so well for Gaston, a man who freely admits to difficulties with thinking, and – SPOILER ALERT! – after a rain-soaked battle with the Beast, during which he plays cheap and stabs the Beast in the back when he isn’t looking, he falls into a gorge and presumably dies. I mean, we can hope. Because nobody needs a direct-to-video “Beauty and the Beast 2: Gaston’s Revenge: The Body Hair and Antlers Edition.” They just don’t.

So Gaston might be an epic jerk, but his song is a delight. In the film and stage versions of Beauty and the Beast, Gaston’s ditty is performed by a tavern-full of drunken villagers who quite literally sing his praises, either because they really like him (LeFou) or because they’re too afraid not to like him (pretty well everybody else.) In between chugging sudsy steins of brew and leaping around the tavern, Gaston’s mates enumerate all of the ways they admire and are in awe of him, from his tree trunk-sized neck, to the dozens of eggs he consumes every morning to maintain his barge-like stature, to the antlers he uses in all of his DE-CO-RATING! It’s such a fun song befitting a much nicer, kinder, less douchey character, but we take what we can get, right?

For these nails I tried to capture some of the “qualities” that make Gaston the primeval jerk we all know and hate, from his red and yellow tunic, to the dandy little bow he wears while wooing Belle, to – my favourite – his ultra plentiful, super crispy chest hair. Gotta love a dude with hairy man-cleave, right? My, what a guy, Gaston.

Disney Girl Challenge: The Silly Girls

Disney Girl Challenge: The Silly Girls

Any Disney aficionado worth his or her salt knows about the Silly Girls, a charming euphemism for the three ditzy girls in Beauty and the Beast who swoon frequently and repeatedly whenever uber-beef Gaston is nearby. I say euphemism because come on, they’re so tavern wenches! I think the most infuriating thing about their interactions with Gaston, which usually involve the trio puddling at his feet, is that he completely and utterly ignores them, a Herculean feat for any other man, what with all the heaving bosoms, but par for the course with Gaston, an egomaniac of the very highest order. He really ought to have treated them better before – spoiler alert! – he fell into a giant gorge. Like anyone else was going to fetch his ale and rub his feet after a hard day of killing things and decorating with antlers (LeFou excepted, as I suspect there’s no end to the things he’d do for his hero.)

So here *I* have thrown a little love the Silly Girls’ way, highlighting their simple, but cleavagey, dresses, their endless smoochies for that letch, Gaston, and a pint of their man’s sudsy brew. Let the swooning commence, ladies!