How to Be a Canadian at Disney

Happy (nearly completed) Canada Day, peeps!  Can’t stand the day myself – that’s what you get for a young lifetime of stupid Can Day celebrations that soured you on the entirety of the holiday (loved starting to drink terrible beer in my best red-and-white duds at eight in the morning with my friends, hated the inevitable skirmish I’d get into with my boyfriends or friends as we desperately tried to find each other 10 minutes before the fireworks in a sea of drunk(er) revelers on Parliament Hill.  Did anybody check the giant lemon?!)

Although I’ve really no reason to continue hating the holiday, since in the intervening years, I’ve had moderately alright to even not-so-terrible Canada Days and…*tails off remembering somewhat recent year grandmother tricked her into visiting relative at very remote Cabin in the Woods (actually, it’s quite a lovely cabin in the woods, totally free of elaborate death mechanisms designed to appease the pagan gods.)*

It’s basically just a day ending in Y for me, albeit one where I’m infinitely more inclined to sport a fly red-and-white mani in honour of July the 1st.  And this year I gave it a Disney twist to go along with the Canada Day video I made for our YouTube channel, Park or Perish!, which is all about being Canadian at Disney.  Which pretty much amounts to having good manners, having good manners whilst drinking, using words like “whilst” and screwing around at the Canada Pavilion at Epcot.  See for yourself below, eh?, and happiest of Canada Days to you all, my Canuck friends, all two remaining hours of it. 😉

Small last minute edit: Just as I was about to click the Publish button on this post, I heard a smattering of fireworks going off, looked out my livingroom window and was treated to a lovely, impromptu, 10 minute-long fireworks display just across the river.  So maybe not ALL of my Canada Days have been horrid. 🙂

Northern Humidity Sends Its Love

Happy Canada Day, friends!  Because it’s hot as beaver balls in my neck of the Canadian woods (hotter and more humid than Orlando, Florida, whose summer weather I’m convinced occupies its very own circle of hell) I am celebrating this national drinking day holiday indoors, as close to my air conditioner as humanly possible.  I see a lot of Trailer Park Boys in my immediate future, as well as the possibly ill-advised plan, given the humidity, to have a roast turkey dinner at my parents’ house tonight, because apparently we are masochists (or are we?  My parents’ house boasts some very nice central air, and I think there’s no foodstuff more Canadian than gravy; we will put it in and on anything, including, but not limited to, toasted sandwiches, fries and cheese curds, and pizza.)

I didn’t do any new nail art to commemorate the 1st this year, but I thought it would be fun – and, let’s face it, easy! – to look back at these Canada Proud manicures I’ve done over the years.  They feature a wide range of beloved Canadiana, from Timmy’s and 50s, to traditional maple leaves (not to be confused with the Maple Leafs) and the almighty beaver.  Happiest of days, Canadian pals!

Finger Candy Gets a .ca

Trailer Park Mustard Tiger

Timmy Ho

Beaver or Dog?

Team Canada

Mr. Dressup’s Tickle Trunk

One-Fiddy

Tim Hortons

Closing out this Canada Day long weekend with a nod to Tim Hortons, the beloved Canadian coffee and donut chain.

So if Canada has, as I assert, a bit of a national drinking problem (most of our holidays devolve into some sort of excuse to get blisteringly drunk whilst lakeside) Tim Hortons is the caffeine and starch purveyor that puts hangovers in their place the morning-after.  I don’t love Timmies, as it’s affectionately called, as much as many of my fellow countrymen and women, although I have warm memories of my dad and I making late night Tim’s runs when I was attending university and he’d shuttle me to and from class. I’d get this powder-based “espresso” concoction that was nothing but pure, ear-splitting sweetness and watery milk; my gateway coffee drug. 😉  They also serve these little donut holes called Timbits – they’re essentially legalized Canadian crack. Perfect for putting some much-needed spring in your step the Tuesday after the long weekend, so chow down and, as always, drink up, Canada.

Canada 150 Ale

Canada is celebrating its 150th year of Confederation this Saturday (also known as its sesquincentennial anniversary; rolls right off the tongue, don’t it?) so I thought it would be fitting to create a manicure honouring a beloved (?) Canadian beer, the Labatt 50.

For any non-Canuck readers out there, 50 Ale, a product of the Labatt Brewing Company, is pretty much on par with Budweiser or PBR (as in it’s yellow, wet, carbonated, contains hops and will get you seriously screwed up on the cheap if you drink about a dozen of them.  And I never have, partly because I’m an old fuddy duddy who turns up her nose at wildly inappropriate alcohol consumption, but also because 50 is nigh undrinkable. I think I’d sooner down a Schlitz.)

“But wait!” you may be saying.  “I thought you Canadians hailed from the land of fantastic beer.  Isn’t every second building in your city a microbrewery now?”  And the answer to all of those questions would be YES (I actually know someone who rents farmland on which to grow his specially-cultivated hops.)  A big old YES…50’s just perhaps not one of those beers.  Then again, we also have LXD (Labatt Extra Dry), Molson Dry (*shudder*) and a high octane, out-of-production animal by the name of Molson XXX, which is the first alcohol I ever drank.  It tasted like cardboard and nightmares.

But 50 will always hold a special place in my heart, and presumably also in the hearts of many, many Canadians across this great country.  It’s the beer of university house parties, homecoming weekends, moves and cottage weekends, and one epic night of karaoke at the Duke of Somerset.  So I can think of no better way to usher in Canada’s 150th than by raising a sudsy pint to the beer that’s been here for the big moments, the little moments, and all those other moments in between that we just call Canadian life. To the next 150!

Happy Canada Day, Ya Hosers

I’m Canadian, and it should be noted that I have NEVER spoken like that in my life!  Aside from some absolutely BRUTAL dialects that come out of the Maritime provinces (Newfoundland, I’m looking at you), I’ve never really found Canadians to have a particular linguistic style.  Then I think about Loonies and Toonies, 26ers (alcohol) and 2-4s (a term used to describe both a case of beer AND the Victoria Day long weekend), “Holy liftin’!” and “Give’r!”, toques and a mickey (more alcohol), and I really think otherwise.  Also, we might have a national drinking problem (do we EVER if we’re drinking Molson – hey-oh!)

This manicure signifies the first time I have ever semi-successfully painted a maple leaf on my nails.  I’m typically total ass at leafs of any description, an odd little glitch in my programming that occupies the same hard drive space as my inability to draw stars or ever remember the rules of football or card games.  I like to think I was inspired by patriotic pride to get it right this time – I did it for my country!  Happy Canada Day, friends – I hope you have a great one. 🙂

Summer Popsicles

Well, we’re right in the mix of this summer business now, aren’t we?  It was a muggy one today, with more of the same supposedly on tap for tomorrow, and just in time for Canada Day.  Ah, but it wouldn’t be any sort of decent Canada Day if you weren’t sweating your bollocks off at either a cottage or on Parliament Hill with about 300,000 of your dearest and drunkest friends.  I will be eschewing all of the above because I am a Canada Day buzzkill – years of just not good times, starting all the way back in high school, have led to me kind of going into hiding on July 1st.  I’m happiest at home, listening to Sloan, watching the Trailer Park Boys, working on my Tim Hortons’ nails.

Speaking of, here’s some nails!  Regrettably not of Timbits (crack-laced donut holes; kidding about the crack part, although Timmy’s fans are kind of rabid about their double-doubles and cherry chips) or anything at all having to do with Canada Day, but I got the summer part in, using Candy Lacquer’s Melting Popsicles glitter topper over a pale blue creme for a pretty, warm weather look that’s at least thematically appropriate for the sweltering summer temperatures.  Might even work for Canada Day itself, were it not for the fact that I’m duty bound by our Constitution to paint red maple leafs on my nails come July 1st.  See you with those tomorrow!

 

Gallery of Canadiana

I popped over to the Weather Network for a moment to check on tomorrow’s forecast for Canada Day. I live in the nation’s capital, and as such, there’s always tons of patriotic parties and one huge blowout of music and fireworks on Parliament Hill, seat of our good nation’s government. It’s quite the event if you’re into crowds, heat, road closures, Blue Rodeo, sunburns and moderate public intoxication. I’m actually not into any of those things (Blue Rodeo excepted; 5 Days in May is a favourite song) so I tend to stick pretty close to home come Canada Day, but it still bums me out to see that tomorrow’s forecast is calling for thunder storms and rain. Take it from a person who may have spent a bit of time doing precisely this, but there’s nothing worse than trying to get your public drink and sun stroke on in a humid downpour. Heh, although one year when Mr. Finger Candy and I lived just a few blocks away from Parliament Hill, we stood on our balcony and laughed uproariously at all the red and white-clad tourists ineffectually pelting down the street to avoid a massive rainstorm that just sort of spun itself out of nothingness. I’m not sure we come out looking so well in that story, but at least we stopped short of taunting, right? Because we’re polite Canadians like that.

This little gallery encompasses some of my more patriotic posts and manis, from the traditional (redwhitemapleleaf) to the not-so traditional (Mr. Dressup’s Tickle Trunk and the Trailer Park Boys.) There’s also a bit of nail art that never fails to make me laugh, last year’s attempt at beaver nails, which I joked at the time really came out looking more like dogs with conjunctivitis. And indeed they still do!

Happy Canada Day, Eh?

Wishing you lots of good, clean, Canadian fun today, fellow Canuks, wherever in this great country of ours you may be enjoying the festivities (like, say, in your livingroom out of the blazing sun and away from the sweaty crowds on Parliament Hill painting your nails. Just as a for-instance.) 😉

Vintage 4th

I’m Canadian, and so I suppose I should be concentrating my nail art activities on tomorrow’s Canada Day (also known as “Sweating Your Ass Off at a Cottage with a 2-4 Day”), but I thought I’d jump ahead and highlight a manicure I did in honour of the other national holiday taking place this week, Independence Day.  The American flag in particular, with its bold colour palette, whimsical stars and precise, horizontal lines is a design dream come true, and whether you stick to the basics or take a few liberties with the overall design, you’ll still wind up with perfectly patriotic polished paws to see you through every party this July 4th long weekend.

For these nails, I layered a handful of holographic polishes in subdued, slightly dusky hues (Cirque’s Luminous Owl and Sky Woman and KB Shimmer’s In Bare Form) over striping tape to create a soft, almost vintage-looking deconstructed American flag design, minus the stars!