Welcome to the Black Parade (31DC2015)

Black Parade Hand

Semi-embarrassing musical confession: About a decade ago, I was hopelessly in love with the ultra theatrical screamo band My Chemical Romance. I say semi-embarrassing because I was perhaps a tad too old to be rockin’ out among the teens who were their core audience, and also because no matter how much I loved their Queen-tinged brand of super dramatic, high concept rock (The Black Parade is an entire album about cancer, for pity’s sake), they were cheesy. Oh my gosh, so cheesy. Although that didn’t stop me from adoring them for at least a couple of years there, and their show I saw in support of The Black Parade ranks right up there as one of one my all-time great concert experiences. They were magnificent, and of that I really shouldn’t be too embarrassed.

Day 22’s theme in the 31 Day Nail Art Challenge was inspired by a song, and I chose the Rose Bowl parade in hell that is The Black Parade, an ash-covered, dystopian nightmare about encroaching death. Cheery AND cheesy are My Chemical Romance – and I wouldn’t want them any other way.

Festival

Festival Collage

If we’re talking about outdoor music festivals, I stopped going to those a long, long time ago. Turns out standing under the baking sun of an endless sky for 14 hours at a stretch in order to catch a 25-minute-long set from your favourite band (plus about 10 other 25-minute-long sets from bands you don’t particularly care about) is a young woman’s game, to say nothing of the Porta Potty situation, which is no woman’s game. It would seem that heatstroke is always pretty lame, even if it’s being backed by Smashing Pumpkins (ESPECIALLY if it’s being backed by Smashing Pumpkins.)

But we’re not here to talk about outdoor music festivals and whiny suck bands of the 1990s, we’re here to talk about nail polish, so on with the lacquered show! This sparkly little gem is Enchanted Polish’s Festival, a metallic micro glitter peppered with holographic rainbow glitter. This polish is a bit of a chamelon – there’s something sort of gold-toned and sandy to it (in the shade it looks like twinkling sea glass washed up on the shore) although at a distance, and depending on the quality of the light, it can also look quite pewter. And while metallics are never a recipe for subtlety – indeed, this one goes bananas out in the sun – Festival is not super in-your-face, a nice choice when you want to rock metallic rainbows without, you know, rocking metallic rainbows.

Formula-wise, Festival is quite lovely, flowing onto the nail smoothly and evenly, with none of that weird clumping micro glitters are typically so fond of. It also dries quickly between coats, although as always with these kind of polishes, you should pay special attention to the tips of your nails where the glitter seemingly never wishes to stick. A lightly dabbed-on coat of Festival just at the edges of your nails will fix that up in a jiffy so you can get on with the serious business of seriously cute nails!

Festival FingersFestival Hand

Champagne Supernova

Champagne Supernova CollageI happen to think this multichrome flakie polish, ILNP’s Supernova, looks best over darker colours, but I couldn’t let the opportunity to make a sweet Oasis joke just pass me by when I had this beautiful, champagne-hued polish, KB Shimmer’s In Bare Form, just sitting there waiting for precisely this moment. What can I say; my stash has excellent comedic timing.

A small word about Oasis. One of my all time favourite bands. Until I saw them live. They were awful. So awful, I have been reduced to speaking only in clipped, authoritative sentence fragments. It was a really bad show, in no small part owing to the brothers Gallagher looking like they were about two seconds from throwing down, which turned out to be a weirdly prophetic thought, as two days later the band broke up for what indeed seems to be for good. I’m not quite sure what I was expecting, having never seen Oasis perform on, say, television, but I guarantee you it was more than the lackadaisical, pompous little dandies that paraded around on stage in front of me. Or not, because they barely moved. Only Liam – ostensibly their lead singer, the charisma man – would periodically saunter to the front of the stage and then point at pretty girls in the audience, miming the ringy-ding motion, setting up his booty calls for later on, I suppose. And they were loud, SO LOUD. Sonic, all-encompassing and totally devoid of any true feeling or connection. A huge letdown. And guys? I have seen some hella sketchy live shows. Those are all stories for another day (about 100 stories – I have been to a lot of concerts) but let’s put it this way – Oasis ranks higher on the Suck-o-Meter than Hole, a show I actually walked out on halfway through because I had gotten heat stroke earlier in the day and just couldn’t deal with Courtney Love’s crazed, pantsless banshee wailing. Seriously, someone get that woman some underpants and a monitor that actually allows her to hear herself.Champagne Supernova Fingers