Unicorn Dreams

Unicorn Schvitz Collage

To paraphrase Ed Helms’ little tiger-centric ditty in The Hangover, what do unicorns dream of, when they take their little unicorn snooze?  Do they dream of impaling idiots in expensive Etsy unicorn headbands, or even bigger idiots at Coachella in some holographic catsuits?

Okay, so I think the whole unicorn thing is a little played out.  I particularly dislike any of the numerous indie bath and beauty products named after any bodily function or fluid of a unicorn.  Seriously, that’s so gross, stop giving your products such off-putting names.

Still, slight diatribe aside, it’s the best descriptor I have for this polish, Liquid Sky Lacquer’s Dream – unicorn-y.  Just look at that rainbow flare!  And the tiny blue flakes and the micro shimmer, and the almost neon-looking holographic effect, too.

I love this polish so much, and I just had to dig it out of “Why don’t I wear this more often?” storage yesterday to take advantage of the dazzlingly bright sun and clear blue skies.  Because this was the weather we were experiencing here about a day and a half ago – total whiteout.  You know, just your standard, bitchingly lame springtime blizzard.  As you do.

And then today’s afternoon forecast is calling for more of the snowy same, only hopefully this time ever so slightly less fierce and roof-rippingly intense.  So good thing I got all these rainbow unicorn sparkles in while I could. 🙂

Unicorn Schvitz Bottle 2

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Spidey Sense

Black Widow Bottle

This cool polish, Lilypad Lacquer’s Rainbows in Space, looks like two totally different polishes depending on whether it’s in the sun or the shade.  Under direct light, its bronze micro-shimmer gives it a rich, almost chocolate brown hue, whereas in the shade, it’s a dusky charcoal grey.

Black Widow 1

Black Widow 3

And the perfect palette on which to display these silver nail charms from Daily Charme.  It’s a little bit of Black Widow mixed with a little bit of Brown Recluse, and it’s Halloween mani perfection.

Polkadotaroo!

Dots 1

Like most Ontario kids who were born in the 1970s and came of (childhood) age in the 1980s, I watched A LOT of The Polka Dot Door.  A production of TV Ontario (holy crap, when’s the last time you saw that name?) The Polka Dot Door was a children’s television show for the seven and under crowd that featured host-led songs and skits and play-acting, and this nutso recurring character by the name of the Polkaroo.  The conceit of the Polkaroo was that the male half of the girl-boy hosting duo would step out for a moment to perform some mundane errand – nip on down to the store for more apples, take out the trash, replace the broken round window in the actual polka dotted door.  Anything to get that guy out of there (toward the end of the show’s run, I remember thinking they had run out of things he just had to do right that very minute, because they were just, like, “Oh, him?  Um, he’s in the can!”)  Anyhow, a few moments after the male host stepped out the door, the Polkaroo magically appeared.  And the Polkaroo was pure nightmare fuel – weird, saggy, baggy plushie body, garish colours, inability to say anything other than “Polkaroo!”  I think he was supposed to be a polka dotted kangaroo, but I just thought he was tacky.

And also CLEARLY the dude half of the hosting team, because after the Polkaroo had blundered about for a bit, knocking things over, pissing off the female host and then learning an invaluable lesson about teamwork, he’d clear out and the male host would sweep back in, all “WhadidImiss?” and the music would hit this “wah-wahhhhhh” cue and the female host would look on in indulgent exasperation.

I really liked The Polka Dot Door – it was one of the better early childhood morality and socialization nudgers of the time – but the Polkaroo never sat well with me, I think because I knew I was being talked down to.  And just because it came with a little wink didn’t lessen the sting of feeling like adults were having one over on me.  Kids – they don’t like to be made to feel like dummies any more than you do!

Anyhow, these polka dotted nails, in a range of Fall-perfect holos, got me thinking about The Polka Dot Door, so that’s how we wound up with this post that has nothing to do with the manicure at hand (and on my hand.)  That a good enough tangent for ya?!  Tangentialicious!  And Polkaroo!

Dots 2

Mega Magpie

Shiny Things Bottle

As in I’m hoping you will make like one and be thoroughly dazzled by the shiny, sparkly things – here Color Club’s mad rainbow-throwing holo wonder, Crystal Baller – so you won’t notice how hopelessly lopsided these chevrons really are.  Yee-ikes!  I don’t know what to tell you, geometry has never been my strong suit, not even in nail art. 😉

Shiny Things Fingers

My Pretty Purple

April 2017 Collage

Afternoon, friends!  Tiny word of warning regarding this post: It’s coming at you primarily under the power of lotsandlots of cold meds.  Toooooo many cold meds!  I’ve been terribly sick since the end of last week, and yesterday, after reaching my breaking point with the headaches, the fever and the nausea, I reached for just a few too many medications instead, and promptly fell into a David Lynchian, *mostly* unaccounted-for 24 hours (best summed up by the shipping confirmation I received from Sephora this morning for an order I do not remember placing last night!)  I will attempt to keep this as linear as possible!

This lovely purple lacquer is Enchanted Polish’s mystery pick for April 2017.  It’s very pretty – can’t go wrong with an Enchanted holo; they always do ’em up right – but probably nothing I’d seek out of my own volition. All the same, I will use the heck out of this polish – there’s always room for a pale purple in my nail art endeavors, and this one is just lovely, in the sun, of course, but also in the shade, where you can see just the tiniest touch of rose shimmer streaked throughout the bottle.  Very pretty.

March 2017 Bottle

Who’s a Naughty Girl Then?

naughty-collage

This polish, that’s who, Different Dimension’s holographic Naughty.  Or should I say “Differen Dimensio”? That’s how my bottle is labelled, owing to what looks like a printing error.  I kind of like it; it sounds like a spell from Harry Potter.  Accio manicuris!

Nomenclature notwithstanding, Naughty is actually a very nice polish, applying smoothly, if a touch thickly, in two coats.  This one requires a fast, steady hand.  But oh my, that colour, and the gorgeous holographic flare (technical term that, flare, meaning the deeply saturated, shimmery bit running down the middle of the bottle.)  I nabbed my bottle at Harlow & Co., who has recently begun dealing in Different Dimension’s beautiful polishes.  It was $17.50 Canadian a bottle and worth every Loonie.

naughty-bottle