I Don’t Think You’re Ready For This Jelly

Rhubarb Custard BottleActually, no, that’s a lie; I totally think you’re ready for this jelly! This is Models Own Rhubarb and Custard, a sweetly-scented, strawberry daiquiri-hued jelly sprinkled with ultra tiny white matte glitter. Released last year as part of their candy-scented Sweet Shop Collection, Rhubarb and Custard, a lush, super saturated candy apple red, applies with the typical ease of a jelly, drying down to an ever so slightly textured finish on account of the matte glitter. A coat of Seche Vite tidies that up in a flash, though, lending this polish all sorts of interesting visual interest and depth, with the glitter doing that fun thing where it looks as though it’s suspended in the polish itself.Rhubarb Custard Fingers

And what of the scent? Very nice, actually, and fairly unobtrusive. Scented polishes can often be nauseatingly cloying, but Rhubarb and Custard, while smelling neither particularly rhubarby or custardy, is pretty in an unidentifiably sweet way, and not the least bit affected by the addition of a topcoat. You can find Models Own polishes, including this candy-coated beauty, at Nail Polish Canada, Harlow & Co. and Llarowe.RC Hand

The A-Team

Without getting too nihilistic on you, friends who come here to see nail art but instead get lured into 1,200-word diatribes on my cats and/or The Lost Boys, 2014 was a bad, bad year. To be sure, there were some lovely, wonderful moments – new babies! an unexpectedly fun road trip! the discovery of Misfits! – but for my family at least, and a distressingly large number of my friends and acquaintances, 2014 was a year defined by loss, grief and hardships great and small. I won’t be sorry to see it go.

Okay, so 2014 sucked. But do you know what didn’t? These nail polishes! Which seems like the ultimate in ridiculous non sequiturs, but really, in a year that’s been as unpleasant as the past one, why shouldn’t we take a moment to appreciate the things that gave us a bit of joy, even those as immaterially material as silly old nail polish? No good reason that I can think of! And so I present to you this photo gallery of the polishes that rocked my world this year, a motley assortment of holos and flakies and industrially chunky glitters that prove that good things – and sometimes good, don’t-hate-the-world feelings – truly do come in small packages. ūüėČ

Sitting atop the heap and not included in this gallery is my pick for polish of the year, Candy Lacquer’s everything-and-the-kitchen-sink glitter, Candy Cane Fiesta. I’ve expounded on its loveliness – some may say at length! – so I’ll say no more before it develops a swelled head.Blue and Green Christmas

The following nine are presented in no particular order or ranking – they’re across-the-board beautiful and so well made, I’ve found uses for them in multiple manis this year, and will continue to well into the new year. Here’s to the little lacquered things!

1. Polish Me Silly’s pink, white and blue glitter topper, Mr. Bubble.Mr. Bubble

2. Smitten Polish’s red shimmer-infused purple jelly, You Saucy Minx.You Saucy Minx

3. KB Shimmer’s Hawaiian Punch-in-a-bottle, Belle of the Mall.Sparkling Strawberry

4. KB Shimmer’s grass green glitter jelly, Get Clover It.Get Clover It

5. Orly’s silver holo of the year, Mirrorball.Mirrorball

6. Dance Legend’s cobalt blue jelly flakie, Sun Still Sleeps.Sun Still Sleeps

7. Candy Lacquer’s super fruity matte glitter, Citrus Smoothie.Citrus Smoothie

8. KB Shimmer’s Frozen-in-a-bottle, Snow Much Fun.Snow Much Fun

9. Polish Me Silly’s pink-to-gold-to-green chrome flakie, Stop Flaking on Me.Stop Flaking on Me

Polish Me Silly’s polishes are available through their Etsy shop. You can find KB Shimmer’s wares through their own site if you’re an American customer, or through Harlow & Co.’s site if you’re an international customer. Smitten Polish’s goods are available through their Big Cartel site, as are Candy Lacquer‘s. Orly polishes are available at brick and mortar Sally Beauty Supply shops, as well as their website. Finally, Dance Legend polishes are best and most reliably acquired through international stocklist Llarowe’s website.

Best. Polish. Ever.

Sun Still Sleeps Outside

There is no arguing that amongst the nail blogging community, we tend to utilize a lot of hyperbole in our writing and reviews.¬† This is the best freaking that and that’s the most amazing this and this is the most lustrous, super wonderful thing in the history of things…you know how it goes.¬† And we’ve all got our own personal preferences (glittery pinks tend to be my jam), so technically none of us are wrong when we go to the mat for a favourite polish.¬† One big lacquered love-in, man, and all that hippie jazz.

Except you’re totally wrong if you love anything other than this polish, Dance Legend’s Sun Still Sleeps from the Candy Flakes Collection.¬† I mean, it’s really sweet of you to think you’ve found the holy grail of nail polishes, but you haven’t, because this is it.¬† And it’s not even glittery pink!¬† Sun Still Sleeps is a gorgeous cerulean jelly loaded with fine green-to-blue-to-copper-leaning flakies.¬† It dries a¬†touch textured (nothing a good top coat can’t¬†fix) and thankfully, owing to the tiny¬†flakie bits,¬†isn’t afflicted with that thing its larger-flaked counterparts often suffer from where¬†giant pieces of glitter stick up off your nail and you destroy your¬†manicure within two hours of application because¬†like your cat,¬†you can’t stop nattering at your claws.¬† It applied beautifully, and three coats gave my nails a gorgeous layered look that was difficult to tear my eyes away from.¬† It’s one for your inner magpie, that’s for sure.

I don’t often recommend products because a) in the parlance of Nirvana, I’d rather not be¬†a baby-kissin’ corporate whore (pfft, whatever – idealism is for people in their 20s; show this old broad the money!) and b) if it doesn’t work out, I’d prefer it if you didn’t blame me, but most of all, because c) I don’t like to share, and if you find out how awesome it is, you might buy it all and then I’ll have none. ūüė¶¬† But I’m feeling magnanimous in my advancing years, and who am I to hog all the glory?¬† One love, man, right?!¬† And so I’ll share – I got mine from Llarowe, along with another couple of polishes, my first Dance Legend purchases.¬† I nabbed mine during a recent bolt-to-the-checkout launch event after which I breathlessly – here we go with the hyperbole again – announced to my husband, “Wow, that was INTENSE!”¬† He rightfully looked at me like I was a loon.¬† I have no doubt it’s sold out as we speak, because it’s just one of those polishes, but check back with Llarowe periodically, as they update their launch lists frequently.¬†

Here’s Sun Still Sleeps in the late afternoon sun, at an angle to show off its beautiful colour-shifting flakes.Sun Still Sleeps Sun